IRRITATING CRAP MY HUSBAND DOES ..... or the old creepy guy in the neighborhood w/ the lawn ornaments ... a working title

It is official my G.O.O. is one of them! By one of them I mean an old person who is obsessed with obtaining more yard ….. errrrr … art. It happened slowly ….. almost so I didn’t even notice …… I guess I have to take some of the blame. 15 years ago when Angels were popular, I bought six small garden angels. They all were doing something different … playing the harp, French horn, sitting, standing .. . you get the idea. They were only about six inches tall. You could barely notice them peeking from behind the Hydrangea bushes. Most of them broke over the years and I bought 2 more to peer from the hostas. G.O.O.  …. who barely if ever even steps into the yard …. called them the “creepy angels”.  I'm also guilty of buying some solar lights for around the fire pit that stay with my ethereal theme but, that 's all I swear!

A few years ago when he went on his disability …. kidney issues …. he decided he would be spending more time smelling the roses sitting in yard. Of course, he needed  the soothing sounds of a fountain to accomplish his vision of garden serenity. Not just any fountain would do …. We shopped around the whole summer …. finally he chose/bought a fountain. From there on every time we go near a garden department he was starting to shop for ‘Gnome” statuary and tacky yard balls  ….. he would put it in the cart I would take it out …..  HE GOT ONE PAST ME! SO, there he is my .... FIRST??? ...  yard gnome! 

He stares at me through my kitchen window. Ho hum …. It could have been worse. G.O.O. really wanted to make a homage to his favorite TV show … The Walking Dead …. kinda of like this ………

Now he is talking more gnomes, solar fountains and ponds.  I don’t how he is gonna see it all from the living room couch in the air-conditioned house! I need to hide this picture before he gets anymore creative  ideas ……

I WANNA GO THERE ....

oOOOOOO .... put it on the bucket list ..."go see world's biggest pool" ... It's in Chile ... okay could be travel issues ....... summer in Chile is December - February .... Okay its a Christmas present ..... On Expedia how much to fly ... oookay $1400 RT ... Hotel not Expedia? Go to hotel web site  .... oooookay $150,000 a night !!!! better be in pesos Juan .... Find Chile money converter .... okay $300 a night  .... Check Trip Advisor  .... what they charge to go in the pool everyday ??? You need to bring your own sheets? towels? soap? toilet paper? sigh  I'M OUT!  I'll just look at the pictures!

THE LAST DANCE .........

It's sad when a segment of pleasurable memories are gone!

 In the ‘80’s when disco was at its height and Donna Summer was the epitome of the era, I remember friends having parties and all the females went into another room to dance to Donna …. Only she could get the party rollin’. Even though everyone had their own personal tastes in music … rock, bubble gum, hard rock, pop or soul … everyone came together to listen and dance and sing … off key of course … with Donna! Every guy we knew hated her.  WE loveD her!!! I still today crank-up the radio when she comes on.  I wished I had seen her in concert the last time she was here …. Sniff  …. I missed it! 

THIS JUST IN ........

TANNING MOM IS IN TALKS FOR A REALITY SHOW !!! ..... yeah why not! 

AND

it only gets better .......

SHE WOULD CONSIDER DOING PLAYBOY 

sigh !

I know it is not news but it was slim pickens today ..... this or whatever JLo was wearing today!!!

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY

A Hallmark moment  ......... Maybe invented my them? .....

No its not actually ..... I know its what I thought growing up!  The celebration of "mother" has been going on since the ancient Greeks and is celebrated around the world!

 Hope you get to celebrate happy! 

THE FORTUNATE ONES

The Fortune 500's list of America's largest Corporations came out today. Does it surprise you that within the top 4 are 3 oil companies?  Nooo?  How does our elected government let this happen? During a reported oil "shortage" the shysters persons of business ... dare... post record earnings. How do you make more $$$$$$$$ selling less?  I must of been absent that lecture day in economics class!

BUT why isn't this a top presidential political platform. I hear so little of any resolutions, except to rape and ravage federal and state pristine forests, game lands, parks, etc. ........ don't even get me started about pollution and greenhouse effects!!!!   This isn't hard!!!  We have made strides in wind, water and solar power. All of it is old old ooold technology but yet it seems never to expand beyond a few grid systems. Okay we all know about the lobbyist system in our government and the big contribution machine to political campaigns .... they need a boot out of government too!

20 years ago I remember seeing the invention of hydrogen cars.  Hydrogen a cleaner "burning" fuel when processed to use in a purer state and we have a ton it in our atmosphere. 20 years later there isn't one in my driveway!!! I doubt yours either due to the expense and limited "hyrostations". If someone found a way to make this cheaper, EXXON would be giving their "shortage" away for practically nothing.  I would feel so bad for them  ... sniff sniff  


OH ... Who is the other bottomdweller bloodsucker reputable conglomerate in the top 4? I'll give you a hint:

THE HYPOCRITE'S GUIDE TO HEALTHY

How's MY New Year's Resolution ... eat better & lose weight ....  going? Probably as well as yours. :-)

I have been off track for the past month ... eating whatever ... no gym visits ... BUT as I sit here eating my 0 calorie Stevia laced Oatmeal topped with skim milk,  I'm starting to feel a little more self- righteously equipped to preach "healthy" again ....

DON'T EAT WHITE! That's riiiiight. If your food is pure white it could contain Titanium Dioxide. .... It just sounds bad don't it? .....  It's used to enhance the color of white in plastics, paints, paper, sunscreen AND food. It is found in toothpaste, salad dressings ... there goes my blue cheese .... , icings .... oh no CAKE??? ....... pre-packaged sauces, and skim milk ... wait a minute.

Titanium Dioxide has been found to contain traces of lead. Though the adverse effects of ingesting or absorbing  the chemical through the skin  are deemed medically inconclusive, inhaling the dust particles have been found to be cancer causing.

Want to reduce your chances? Brush your teeth with minty green, use olive oils on your salad, cover up some places ... that upper chest area maybe. The girls will be so appreciative .... when you go outside, make your own cakes from scratch  .... What? I should say stay away from cake for the rest of my life? Hey, I'm on a diet not in prison .... even prisoners get cake once in a while!

Was the EMERGENCY stop button broke?

Did you see this? ...... This is 44 year old Patricia Krentcil ... yes you read that right 44 YEARS OLD ........ Patricia is an admitted avid tanner ... ya think!! Patricia is accused of bring her fair-haired 5-year into the tanning booth with her. Depending on which news agency you read, the child went to school with 1st-2nd degree burns. Her parents claim it was sunburn. We shall see .......

But apparently, since Patricia was receiving all this attention she thought it best to also add a spray tan to that "healthy glow"  .... her words ... for the all the camera interviews she felt she needed to give to plead her case to the general public for sympathy??? .... stardom??? ..... the ethical treatment of microwaving ???

 
I think it may have been your second worst decision this week Patricia!!