CALGON TAKE ME AWAY .....

If ever I get around to building that house I’ve been dreaming of for years, I plan to incorporate a regal Master suite so awe-inspiringly virtuosic that people who visit shall be so “jealuss”!  And in contemporary terms, what would a proper MASTER bath be without a jetted tub! Yeeeees …. My luxury bubble making machine would have cream colored terrazzo covering the platform for me to sit on as I slide effortlessly in and out of my spa. The tub will be also niched into a custom boxed bay, walled in with nothing but windows ….. I haven’t quite figured out how the neighbors won’t see me yet, I’m working on it! ……… I shall fill it every evening with warm …. No  …no … hot as I can stand it water and soak my worries away ………………… aaaaahhhhhh!!!

Snap snap snap …….. sorry I’m back! I been researching the jetted tub and sometimes stay at places just because there is THAT tub. I don’t know about you but, I haven’t quite gotten to the Nirvana I described above when I’m in one. First off,  there is the jets …… Yes I’m bitching about the jets that make it bubbly …… every time I try to back into one for that lower back “massage”, I end up giving myself an unneeded enema! Then there is the weird configuration …… that are sculpted to match the curves of your body ….. after I get past the unwelcomed water intrusion, I get uncomfortable in those "ergonomic" seats and just end up floating around in the middle away from them. Most of the tubs do not reheat the water so it is only hot for like 10 minutes after you waited 30 to fill it !!! Don’t even get me started on what I found out about the mold and bacteria making their homes inside the jets if not properly cleaned. YUuuuuCKKKK ... you dont want to know!!!

So, now, I’m back to basics. I just want a nice big old-fashioned soaking tub … with a heater of course! I’m thinking of this style :

Pretty basic uuuhhh? ……………….. I’m so over the Jacuzzi ……

HARVEST MOON

I've been very busy lately with my "HARVEST MOON" dinner tomorrow night.  Oh yes, Saturday, September 29th is a Harvest Moon .... and what is a HARVEST MOON DINNER? Something I started with my family .... actually it is supposed to be any FULL MOON that falls on a weekend ..... an excuse to get together with family and friends. I'll fess up .... I actually saw the idea in Better Homes & Gardens years ago. Everyone looked so festive ...... in the posed pictures .......  to be out in the crisp autumn evening air ...... probably freezing their asses off ......... 

As I have said before, Fall is my favorite season! And it is quite possible I decorate more for Fall than Christmas  ..... wellllll there is that (2) tree thing going on in my home ..... regardless my Fall Harvest decor will be up for 2+ months.

I "C" HORRIBLE PEOPLE

Five days ago youngest daughter witnessed and had to get out of the car to saved a dog that was hit by a vehicle on a busy State Route ....... 4 lanes with added turning lanes where every driver thinks they are going slow if they are doing 60 ......   The small dog would have been hit again and as my strong minded daughter step in front of cars to stop them they angrily honked and screamed at her.  Fortunately for the dog she scoped him up and took him to our VET. Youngest talks of becoming a VET tech and has interned in a VET office .... she had to help with operations and gagged up whatever the first few times afterward ......  so, she is used to seeing animals hurt. This pooch got himself a broken leg out of his adventure.

The scuffy little dog .... not him in the pic by the way .... had a collar with a name .... BINGO .... and the phone number of the owner. Youngest visits her rescue everyday .... and he wags his tail and looks happy to C her ..... since she took him to our VET. The VET's office staff told her they have been calling the owner 4-5 times a day and left messages as to what happened to and how their pet is. NO RESPONSE. This is where I would normally rant but you are probably already doing that so .... I will save my energy!

Of course, daughter wants to adopt him BUT we have an old pooch that would never put up with a newbie. The VET has made arrangements to send BINGO to a local organization "no kill" shelter called ANIMALS FRIENDS. There he will have a better chance of having someone that really wants him and take him home instead of the scum bags he obviously ran away from!

I'd like to get my hands on that collar phone number!

THE HYPOCRITE’S GUIDE TO HEALTHY

Still on my DASH DIET .... down 16 lbs !!!

THINGS I REALIZED THAT WORK FOR ME THIS WEEK ... Quit eating salad! Yes, you read that right .... QUIT EATING SALAD!!!! I have not had a side salad all week. Side Salads are boring. If you are like me you can not eat a dry salad. You need dressing and your crunchies ...i.e., croutons. CRUNCHIES + DRESSING = ALL YOUR FATS FOR THE DAY!

I 'd rather use my fat allowance in cooking my food/sauce or in the sprinkle cheese I'm going to have to use to make everything taste better. Of course, there is no way around it ...... you have to get your veggies!  This week I took my cup of fresh spinach leaves, threw them in the pan with one quick stir to steam them just as I was done cooking my meal. It was still crunchie .... okay it isn't a nice buttery crouton ..... and had enough flavor from the other food/sauce to cover that "raw" taste  .... apologies to Carol Alt .  

THE HYPOCRITE’S GUIDE TO HEALTHY

After almost five months of following my New Year's Resolution and changing my diet over to more healthy eating,  I was at the stand still of a tired old 5 lb weight lost. Ho Hum  ……. I HAD  to get serious …AND I did!!! I found the DASH Diet …. The answer to what I was trying to make-up on my own.  Now I am down another 8 lbs in 8 DAYS!!! YEAH!!!

Things I realized that work for me:

STRUCTURE – I NEED STRUCTURE!!! The diet has to be written down on what I have to eat each meal. I can’t be making up my own stuff: Lemon cooked Salmon w/ a side spinach salad followed by a quart of Baskin Robbins Pralines & Cream didn’t do it. Imagine that!

DON’T WEIGH YOURSELF EVERYDAY – Some days your scale says you lost nothing. Nothing after making yourself eat quinoa.  Losing nothing makes you depress. Being depressed makes you say: “WTH?”  and you go eat a Quart of  Baskin Robbins Pralines & Cream . Weight yourself every other day OR GO LONGER!!! Be delightfully happy with that 1 pound then.

I ordered some daily menu and recipe books ... they better get here soon  ....  I've already figured out the nearest Baskin Robbins is 15 miles away! You would think after a lifetime of dieting I would get better at this!

THE HYPOCRITE'S GUIDE TO HEALTHY

How's MY New Year's Resolution ... eat better & lose weight ....  going? Probably as well as yours. :-)

I have been off track for the past month ... eating whatever ... no gym visits ... BUT as I sit here eating my 0 calorie Stevia laced Oatmeal topped with skim milk,  I'm starting to feel a little more self- righteously equipped to preach "healthy" again ....

DON'T EAT WHITE! That's riiiiight. If your food is pure white it could contain Titanium Dioxide. .... It just sounds bad don't it? .....  It's used to enhance the color of white in plastics, paints, paper, sunscreen AND food. It is found in toothpaste, salad dressings ... there goes my blue cheese .... , icings .... oh no CAKE??? ....... pre-packaged sauces, and skim milk ... wait a minute.

Titanium Dioxide has been found to contain traces of lead. Though the adverse effects of ingesting or absorbing  the chemical through the skin  are deemed medically inconclusive, inhaling the dust particles have been found to be cancer causing.

Want to reduce your chances? Brush your teeth with minty green, use olive oils on your salad, cover up some places ... that upper chest area maybe. The girls will be so appreciative .... when you go outside, make your own cakes from scratch  .... What? I should say stay away from cake for the rest of my life? Hey, I'm on a diet not in prison .... even prisoners get cake once in a while!

COCKTAIL TIME!

Fresh from a weekend of girlfriends, cocktails, food, games, food, cocktails, gossip, food, cocktails, music, cocktails, food & my favorite ..... every one's cocktail-food ..... shrimp! So, after eating my share of the succulent platter and thinking all that could possibly happen is elevated cholesterol ... I just by chance RE-read an article I forgot all about: The Five Grossest Things You Can Eat! You guess it, smack in the middle of that list is shrimp! Having two little beady eyes looking at you and a slimy black vein to remove are the least of the gross issue.

What makes them so gross they are one of the grossiest things? Most of the thin shelled ones are imported from "farms" overseas .... hmmmmmm could that be China ..... whose tanks are plied with chemicals to disinfect their filthy farming pens. Add to that our pinky friends are also snacking on and swimming in Rat turds and bugs. Yummy! Only 20% of the farmed imports are even inspected!!! .... WTF??? You want better .... there is better ...say it ... say it ... say it with me now .... DOMESTIC !!!! That's right the best and safest is home grown from the Gulf. When will we learn to eat what's in our own backyards. Sigh!

Ho Hum …. still trying to stay on my New Year’s resolution of lose weight, exercise more or at the very least ….. eat better! So far, after 1 -1/2 months we have Weight loss: 2 lbs … better than gaining I guess ... joined a gym … started out at 5 times now I’m down to paltry 1-2 times a week … I’m headed there now.

We came back from shopping a little while ago and I bought my new "try-it" veggie: Swiss Chard. Saw it on the info screen that flashes nutritional information while I was on the treadmill at the gym … Yeah, yeah I’m going ……. I‘ve heard of it before but I don’t know what I’m going to do with it. But, hey the info board says it is really really really nutritional!!! Actually THE healthiest veggie out there …. I'll let you know about that when I figure out what it is going to go with … or in …. or by itself … with spices ... its pretty ... maybe it will look good in vase?